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The Eclipse Conspiracy

3 comments, 258 views, posted 2:52 am 20/08/2017 in Funny Stuff by HariSeldon
HariSeldon has 6221 posts, 3272 threads, 250 points
Uber God

The scientists are all talking like it’s a sure thing.

On August 21, the “moon” will pass between the Earth and the sun, obscuring the light of the latter. The government agency NASA says this will result in “one of nature’s most awe-inspiring sights.” The astronomers there claim to have calculated down to the minute exactly when and where this will happen, and for how long. They have reportedly known about this eclipse for years, just by virtue of some sort of complex math.

This seems extremely unlikely. I can’t even find these eclipse calculations on their website to check them for myself.

Meanwhile the scientists tell us we can’t look at it without special glasses because “looking directly at the sun is unsafe.”

That is, of course, unless we wear glasses that are on a list issued by these very same scientists. Meanwhile, corporations like Amazon are profiting from the sale of these eclipse glasses. Is anyone asking how many of these astronomers also, conveniently, belong to Amazon Prime?

Let’s follow the money a little further. Hotels along the “path of totality”—a region drawn up by Obama-era NASA scientists—have been sold out for months. Some of those hotels are owned and operated by large multinational corporations. Where else do these hotels have locations? You guessed it: Washington, D.C.

In fact the entire politico-scientifico-corporate power structure is aligned behind the eclipse. This includes the mainstream media. How many news stories have you read about how the eclipse won’t happen?

Meanwhile the newspaper owner Jeff Bezos is out there buying all of Seattle with the revenue from these “eclipse glasses.”

You’d think there would be a balanced look at even considering the idea that the eclipse isn’t going to happen. It’s like no one is even thinking to question this. Where are their voices? Why does Google give so few results that say the eclipse is fake? I would start by looking at Mark Zuckerberg and Charles “Chuck” Schumer.

I am not saying the eclipse isn’t going to happen. I’m just saying there are two sides to every story.

Extra Points Given by:

MASTERV (25), REALITY (5), tricpe (5), tamsnod27 (5)

Comments

2
8:28 am 20/08/2017

MASTERV

Ready Get Set! Here we go the 2017 Eclipse is about to unleash a torrent of crazies upon the world:
Proof of the world being flat
Proof of Planet X the Nibiru cataclysm
Alien Mega Ship sighting and other alien shenanigans
North Korea will launch a war with the US during the Eclipse
Eclipse causes New Madrid fault to move
Eclipse causes Yellowstone Super Volcano to explode
Government cover up of mass blinding of people across the country due to faulty glasses
Polar shift makes a major move during eclipse

And on and on and on it will go

3
5:02 pm 20/08/2017

tricpe

1
5:17 pm 20/08/2017

REALITY

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