61058 total points (all time)
Last seen 50 minutes ago
Joined 8:45 pm 18/10/2006
This needs updated again, with pics too
Well after the town surviving Irene without a hitch Snowpocalypse 2011 took out our little City. We lost power on Saturday night, at it's highest 70% of the City was powerless and every town/village/city around us was at 100% outage. CL&P took their sweet time and managed to get power back to my part of town, the last 4-5% early this morning at 3am. We are very annoyed, and so is most of the State, especially since after Irene promises were not kept that could have prevented most of the issues.
Well things seem ok for the time being, got done with training, just completed my first full week of work out of training. The job is a bit frustrating but essentially easy, frustrating in that you have to deal with people that can't find the Tools menu in IE.
Kids are doing good.
William my youngest seems to have his seizures under control, he's only had 1 since he last went to the ER, and that was because he missed a dose of his medication. The specialist seems to think it could be a bout of temporary seizures and he should grow out of them, and only for now changed the frequency of his dosages. My oldest turned 15 last week, she's almost a grown Woman . The middle child is his usual overachieving self.
The Ex moved her BF in and I hear things are going well for them. I plan on driving down and seeing the kids real soon, just have to coordinate with her for when exactly.
Does feel a bit weird living back with Mom and her Hubby, I generally stay out of sight. One thing that really sucks is other than from work I really know no one and all my cousins are younger than me so meeting a nice lady to date is harder than I expected, hopefully that will change soon. I will be looking at rental prices in the area and if I get picked up permanently at work I'll be moving out of Mom's place (might help me score with the ladies too)
I got me a new monitor and all I have to say is
of pure uberness
Well life just went from bad to worse. The Ex and me due to some really complicated and screwed up reasons are sharing a place again. To add to the stress I'm still unemployed. Well Wednesday night for the second night in a row, she had these horrible pains in her stomach area, while not new she had never had an attack two nights in a row, it was usually for an hour or so every 6 months give or take. So off to the Emergency room we go at 1:30 am, happens to be that she has Gall Bladder stones, and the pains were because it was blocking her bile production, she gets hooked up with some pain killers and all is ok, other than the fee (bill hasn't come yet), that includes an ultrasound they took to make the diagnosis. To make matters even worse is the fact that now we also have to figure out how to pay to have her gall bladder removed before it gets infected and we have to hit the E room again.
OK my neighbors SUCK, they've called the cops on my 4 times now since August, mainly over "noise", the so called noise is either me playing WoW or watching a Movie, both on my PC on my 5.1 speakers. also it seems like they've been complaining to the Landlord on top of that. To make matters worse, over the weekend I had my ex and the kids over, Sunday I played some music ~12 or 1, my ex barely noticed it was playing and she was in the same room as me, Sun afternoon I get a call from the Landlord, and he's pissed, claiming that people were complaining about my music during the DAY, I can understand at night and I've adjusted accordingly, at 9pm I turn everything down way low or off, I don't watch movies after 9, and turn the bass box all the way down. To make matters worse, yesterday (Mon) the Cops come knocking at my door at ~1pm, I had stepped out and during my 15 min absence my Ex had to yell at one of the boys for scratching the other one, Cops got called because supposedly there was yelling and banging for 20+ minutes.
I was mighty close to going off over that but stayed calm, as soon as I get a new job, I'm out of this crappy situation.
Well as if all my other issues weren't enough, I got laydoff Friday night. We all knew that with the Holidays coming they would do a small to medium purge, as work does tend to slow down at this time, but the real surprise was who was let go.
It seems that the project manager in his infinite wisdom (he's really an idiot) decided to let go of the most experienced people that worked there, the people that worked on the Classified equipment and the ones who'd stayed even after all the bad decisions and horrible ideas he came up with.
So if you live in South Central PA and know someone looking for an IT guy and willing to pay ~35k a year, drop me a line
As a guy you always hear of this "Me Time" concept, well guys if you are married and/or have kids, trust me "Me Time" is overrated, spend time with your kids or wife, one day you could find yourself in my situation and realize that being alone just plain sucks.
Yep nothing more thrilling than coming home to an empty apartment, no "Hi babe, how was your day?", no "DADDY!!!!" nope, nothing but the hum of the fridge, or the sound of your PC's power supply. You have all the "Me Time" you want and guess what? You stand in your living room and all you want to do is SCREAM! just to kill the silence.
It's gotten so bad I now talk to myself just to hear another voice, the TV in the background doesn't help anymore.
Then there's bed time, no more warm sexy body there for you to snuggle with, nothing to hold on to for comfort, nothing. You lay in a cold empty bed and hope you can pass out of tiredness before your mind starts missing her or anyone for that matter, sometimes drinking can help, especially on weekends when you had more time to dedicate to her and maybe just lay in bed chit chatting away till you either got some or you both fell asleep.
Nothing more fun than waking up in the middle of the night freaking out because in your dreams she's right there and then you come to the maddening realization, she really isn't there anymore. You lay back down and hope you can fall asleep before the tears come, yes grown men will cry out of frustration and loneliness. Just remembering that even at it's worse, even after that huge argument you had with her, that if you were smart you would both make up and there she was sound asleep and all you do out of relief is hold onto her till morning.
Now some might say, "Z why don't you go out and start dating?" well when you're 35 and just came out of a 13 year relationship there are many things that have changed in the "Dating Scene". I've gone to the bar/club a few times, not my style, I'm just lost in this world. Some like my ex will say, "You will meet someone at work/school" well bullshit between work and school I know ~20 Women, a good 15 are either married or in a serious relationship, plus there's the whole thing about dating co workers, what if the relationship fails, then what? In my field there are few Women, and the few you work with, you have to sometimes work with in a close environment, don't know about you but if you had to work with the chick you just got dumped by or you dumped will make for some long and uncomfortable days at work. Dating site? LOL please, a waste of time at best.
So what do I do, risk it with the cute Divorced chick at work and hope for the best? Nah I will stay a close friend to her and only wonder what could have been, maybe even hope for that next job to hurry up and pop up so that maybe then you will work up the guts to ask her out, all the time hoping she hasn't found someone else before you work up the guts to ask her out.
And like all things you are back to square one and your empty apartment.
Someone pass me a beer, there are too many hours left till bed time.
Well after my rant from a few days ago I'm feeling much better. Was cathartic finally letting out some shit I was holding in, you know trying to be the "good guy" in this situation and trying to not show how I really felt to not give my ex any ideas plus trying to act "manly" and "grown up" for the kids.
I have at least something to look forward to, I finish school on the 2nd of December and the graduation is on the 16th. I'm also in a weird "relationship" with a nice girl from work, I've known her for a few months now but wasn't till recently that we started talking and hanging out. She's in a similar situation as me but she has 3 kids to also support, and the poor girl busts her ass off trying to make the meager pay she makes. She's actually called mt twice now (to my surprise) and on top of talking at work, hanging out at the bar twice, we've spent quite a few hours now talking on the phone.
Now I have no clue where this is going or if it is anything more than a good friendship but it's nice to have someone to talk to from time to time, and we'll see where it leads
Yep, I'm depressed. I hate coming home to my little empty apartment. I realized that this is really the first time I've actually been alone and I gotta say it sucks to no end. The only thing that seems to be keeping me going is that I'm just about done with school. After that? YAY more nights coming home to my empty and depressing apartment. Other than my kids and my ex, all I have are 3 people I would call friends, we hang out at work and occasionally after work. Yes I know I'm ranting but I don't fucking care anymore, I've put on the "strong" face for too fucking long and I'm fed up with it. I'm fucking pissed still that I essentially wasted my life away to support a person that was able to throw me to the side like this for a younger fucking model. I hate that my kids know more about what the fuck is going on than me and I hate my fucking in laws and their condescending ways. So to close my little rant, if you are dating, don't get married, if your married and your siginificant other seems distant get the fuck out while you can, prolonging the inevitable isn't going to do any fucking good. I'm off to find a corner and hopefully pass out drunk.
Well in a week I start my last quarter of school, it's been a long and arduous process for me. I started school again in April of 05, to the disdain of my inlaws, only to be told a few weeks into my first quarter that my wife wanted out of our marriage for what I still consider nebulous reasons. She says it's because I don't do IT for her anymore but can't tell me what this IT is. At the same time behind our backs, our landlord sold the house we were renting and told us the day the sale closed, the next day the new owners evicted us, essentially just because they wanted us out. We ended up homeless for about 3 weeks while looking for somewhere to live and still working, I ended up taking my second quarter off due to this and some other reasons.
We eventually find a new place and try to settle in, while the inlaws decide that popping in at random unannounced times was a good idea, and somehow finding out where we live after my Ex decided to not tell them where we were because they decided to leave us on the street when we got thrown out our house.
After letting things mellow out for a year I start looking for a place to move to, and finally did.
So now I'm down to my last 3 classes, settling into my new apartment and figuring out the single life again. I can't wait till December rolls around to finally graduate and start looking for a Job in my chosen field of Computer Networking.
Well this last week was rough for me, my 13 year marriage ended. Now it was supposed to happen quite a while ago, like 2 years ago, but things weren't right, what with a forced move to York Haven and then loosing my job.
So now I'm living in Mechanicsburg again and trying to remember what it was to be single and in an emptyish apartment.
In a way I'm glad it's finally over but I'm also sad that it happened at all. One of the few things about it taking so long to happen is that my kids are old enough to understand what and why it happened and to realize it has nothing to do with them. I think they'll handle the transition better than me, but at least I'm out of my mini depression.
So now comes the shitty part, I'm 35 and starting to date again, and I have no clue what I'm doing, I dedicated myself to be the best husband and father I could be and left my single life in the past, on top of that dating has changed since my days and I have no clue what the signals and how all that other stuff works now a days.
Exhausted, but this is essentially an easy job. Unpack the new PC/Laptop. Add any peripherals and/or RAM. Verify documentation, since it's for the Navy, the documentation is 3/4 of the process. Hook it up to the network, set necessary BIOS Settings, fire up the PC, make sure the proper image is loaded.
Well Tomorrow is new Job day for me, I hope the Guards at the Navy Base don't give me too much hassle trying to get on.
The best part is I'm finally breaking into Computers 2 quarters before I'm done getting my Associates Degree. It's a contract job Imaging the new Dells the Navy is currently getting. I'm getting payed $2 more than the listed max pay so I hope that's a good sign
I actually started the application process just before Christmas and with all the background checks and getting a security clearance, it's taken this long .